Violence, infidelity, no love – good reasons to end a relationship! Some separation reasons, however, are less good – but unfortunately still convince many …
No question: when the relationship is over , we should part. Otherwise, it costs both parties unnecessarily time, nerves and strength. But not that we fall into the trap and put an end to the wrong reasons! In the following apparent relationship problems, we should at least three times consider whether a separation is really the solution …
Typical reasons of separation, which are really not
1. “My partner does not make me happy.”
If he is right, he makes me happy, and if he does not make me happy, he is not the right one – think many. But they forget something: it is not our partner’s job to make us happy. That is our own task alone . What we can expect from the human being at our side is simply that it does not stand in the way of us and in the best case supports us. But: If the partner makes us unhappy , that is of course a reason for separation !
2. “There’s no tingling (anymore) when I think about him.”
Butterflies in the stomach , weak knees, anytime the desire for sex – is part of a happy relationship indeed. Nope! All of these are merely symptoms of being in love, a state of stress in which our body finds itself in the introductory and initial stages of a relationship. But he (luckily) stops for a maximum of one year, then, in the ideal case, the infatuation will become more and instead of tingling in the stomach we may look for the signs of love .
3. “We rely too much on each other.”
Once you have found true love , you will never let it go again and do everything to keep it – all right, but this “doing everything for it” expresses itself in long-term relationships rarely in weekly romantic love evidence or in the morning first for the other dress up. Clearly, happy couples, even after years of partnership, show that they value each other and respect each other. But most of all, this is expressed in growing trust, knowing that the other does not leave us, because we get wrinkles, and love each other, even if he does not come home every week with flowers. Counting on the others and even taking it for granted that he is with us in good times and bad times is something positive – and certainly not a reason for separation.
4. “We fight too hard.”
If two people really fit together, the relationship is harmonious and there is little dispute and disagreement – you might think, but it’s not true. After all, we always have two different people with two independent minds, worldviews and emotional worlds, and it’s also normal for us to get lost. The only thing that matters is that we argue with each other on equal terms with our partner. Only when one man backs away while the other hands out, the relationship is under no good star. On the other hand both make their displeasure alike air, that is healthy – and with subsequent reconciliation sex even in two ways!