At your dates you have understood each other very well. Now it’s getting serious – and you’re asking yourself: is that really fitting? You can tell by this sign!
He loves Chinese food – you can not look at death. Or: He calls you an order freak, while you can only shake his head about him as a cleaning muffle. And sometimes the feeling creeps up: Do we really fit together? Or you even ask yourself: Should I break up ?
Do not panic – it’s not always the most obvious qualities that need to be completely the same for a relationship to be long and happy. We’ll tell you what signs are for a stable partnership.
1. You balance each other
A balanced partnership does not mean that everything must always be decided 50:50. Only in the overall picture, the mixture should be right. Means: At parties, one is the lab bag that likes to be in the limelight; for weekend excursions the other is the impulse generator. Or: She is the sportsman who persuades him to jog; He’ll pick her up when she turns up at home and take a breather. So you do not have to have identical hobbies, nor be exact opposites – rather, your properties should basically mesh like puzzle pieces.
2. You are not ashamed of each other
Attention: Always rumpupsen before and delay the hair washing until get no – that’s not meant. (In the worst case, the sex appeal is totally flute.) But in a trusting relationship, you need not be ashamed of the other. Sometimes you just have gastrointestinal upsets and it sounds louder sounds from the bathroom. Or in the evening when removing make-up previously hidden pimples to the fore. If that is not embarrassing for your partner, you are on the right track. The other way around: The feelings of the other person should not be influenced by this!
3. You know why it’s worth it
There’s a fight everywhere. The difference with a family Zoff: Here the reconciliation is usually programmed – because the kinship ties somehow hold together. Different in a relationship. Because it does not necessarily depend on the frequency of discussions. But on the WHY, if you reconcile: Do you just put up your fight because you no longer have the urge to talk further? Or is one small, because the other always prevails anyway? Better: step back, look at the big picture. And, ideally, come to the conclusion that both have superior but the same goals. A reconciliation, because you know that you are fundamentally in line – and it will not fail on the bright wall paint or the broken coffee mug.
4. You are doing well
Sounds simple – but is elementary. Of course, not everything is always rosy, and “good” relationships are characterized by the fact that they survive even hard times. However, if a partnership is more effective in the long term than soul balm, it will lead to frustration in the long run. The one who always gives and never gets anything back – and possibly the other, who notices the frustration of the partner.
And if all this does not apply to you? And friends and family have preached to you forever “He’s not good for you” and “You just do not fit together”? Then listen to yourself deeply. Your inner voice and your honest (!) Gut feeling often give you the right signal …
You just got to know your sweetheart and you still can not guess all that? Then take a look here: