Ute Merz dared an experiment after her divorce – and gave herself a Tinder-Blind-Date on her birthday…
What to do on a birthday? Something completely different!
My birthday is coming. This time not exactly a number for the giant party or the dignified dinner invitation for friends, as I have kept it the years before.
No, because this time everything is different: It is my first birthday after the official separation from the husband. Something special has to happen. What exciting. Something new.
“How about, for example, an underground dinner in an unfamiliar place with unknown people at the table?”
Perfect! Food is my passion (unfortunately!) And new people are exactly my thing. And lo and behold, even in my potty city officials Google spits out such an event. Bingo, appointment fits! Exactly at my celebration.
The menu reads culinary refreshing, but the price … olàlà. But it promises to be an exciting meeting in a slightly morbid atmosphere with the palate-joyful academics (because of the price). Buy two tickets!
But who am I going with? With my bosom friend or my best buddy? It will find one already. Speaking of finding …
“After my last Tinder-flop, I might once again dare to take a tiny look into the world of the lonely and lonely (sorry!)”
I sneak around my phone. For once it could not be a totally contaminated psycho-type (I’m just standing on “artist”) jumping out !? If I just change my predicament, meet somebody who radiates consistency, reliability and a certain conservatism … would not I be on the safe side?
Yes, do it! Do it! Download Tinder again! No, stay strong! Think of your sensitive soul!
In the evening I write with Thilo. Thilo is an insurance salesman. No children, 1.80, slim, full hair, very good photos.
The next day I phone Thilo
He has a nice voice and does not want to turn me on a disability insurance right away. It’s okay, Mrs. Merz! You can also talk to normal men quite well.
We arrange a meeting in the local museum café (to test a bit, if he likes culture, without it’s just not possible …). To understand why he can not come to this date then, you have to know that I have my birthday in January. And if it’s snowing here then it’s neat. Thilo has been overrun by the snow at short notice. But nice as he is, he offers to compensate for telephone communication.
Okay, I pull my phone and make myself comfortable with a bottle of red wine and chips on the sofa. Dear reader, please do not! No, not the chips! Yes, the red wine! You better leave that! Especially if you react to it like me. My tongue will then always faster than my spinal cord and overtakes me almost from scratch. After two hours, an empty bottle and a lot of chatter, I hang up.
My God, did I really do that now?
Did I really get myself a blind date for my birthday? Did I choose the insurance freak for my birthday escort? Yes, I did!
Slightly staggering, but with a nice stupid grin and a certain combative satisfaction, I go to bed.
The next morning, a roar in my skull reminds me of my sins from the night before. And a scrutinizing look in the mirror makes me look just as old as I am today.
But the thought of a tingling evening with an uncertain outcome quickly brings me back to my inner age (something between 25 and 35). During a full-body exfoliation in the shower, I play through possible combinations of outfits: from the “Vampkleidchen” (with matching sexy underwear) to the “I-am-your-mates” -Jeans-variation to the “Ladylike with an unconventional touch” version everything is in it today.
I choose what I always wear. The one in which I currently look the slimmest: black stretch pants with a black blouse.
In between, I answer my telephone and electronic birthday greetings: “No, today nothing great … yes, just relaxed eating out with your girlfriend … no, no new man, who needs something?” And the tension increases, my My pulse is throbbing and I paint the last hectic spots from the décolletage before I make my way to my secret blind date.
An Opel Corsa abruptly ends my dreams
I lean casually at the agreed parking lot at my car door (I’m stupidly always too early on dates) and look out for Mister Unknown. Will I recognize him immediately? What will he bring me to my cradle party? Flowers, chocolates, sinfully expensive diamond earrings, a yacht, the key to our house, or maybe …
The squeaky brakes of an Opel Corsa abruptly end my dreams and climb out…Thilo? … THILOOOOOO?
Wait a moment! Are men of 1.80 not clearly taller than me, and why does he have bald and bald heads now? And why is he so determinedly approaching me?
“Hello, Ute! Nice to meet you! “, It sounds a hand’s breadth under my chin from a hairy face. My do-gooder voice in me hones me that it is now necessary to focus on the inner values of the other person. He is certainly a shrewd entertainer, old-school cavalier, and a charm-bolt before the Lord.
“Thanks a lot for the invitation! Have your birthday. Have not brought anything, I found a bit exaggerated! Let’s go in, get hungry! “He says, patting my shoulder.
Invitation? Nothing here? I beg your pardon?
To make it short. I had a very nice evening. Really entertaining, amusing, with stimulating conversations with a wonderful man. With my unknown table neighbor. The left of me. Musician, sensitive and a little bit crazy. Counted on what you could give a woman like me for Blind Date birthday everything. When Thilo went home that night, I do not remember.
All I can say is, I love blind dates. Sometimes you can be really lucky.